Perfect love

Its amazing how God's word is so gray sometimes and then other times it is clearly black and white. This following scripture is an example of that "black and white."

There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear, because fear involves punishment, and the one who fears is not perfected in love." -1 John 4:18

A room cannot be dark and light at the same time. Darkness and light cannot coexist. In the same way, love and fear cannot coexist.

Ouch. That basically told me that I have not accepted God's love....that I doubt it. I have (as does everyone if they are honest with themselves) LOTS of fear and worry about things....about money, about my kids, about my husband and marriage, about what others think of me. But all that this fear signals to others is that I think I can do a better job controlling my life than God can. My pastor reminded me yesterday that people who live this way....who live in fear and worry and are trying to control their own lives....are practical atheists. Practical atheists live as if there is no God. Ouch again. That is devastating to me that I could be labeled as a practical atheist.

So what can I do about this? My first instinct is to make a list of things that I need to do a better job of (reading my bible, praying, etc.) While those things are good and helpful things to do, all that does is promote the idea again that I can control my own life...that I can be closer to God by stuff that I do.

What the above verse is saying is that I need to dwell in God's perfect love. One definition of the word "dwell" is "to fasten one's attention. Therefore, it would make no sense to "fasten my attention" to my list of "things to do to be better." And it makes no sense to "fasten my attention" to fear or worry. I need to "fasten my attention" to God's perfect love...which in return should one day make me perfected/complete.