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Friday, January 21, 2011

Vow

It's amazing how when reading the Word of God, the seemingly useless information in there can sometimes be the most important and life changing words.

That is how I feel about Acts 18:18.

Paul stayed on in Corinth for some time. Then he left the brothers and sisters and sailed for Syria, accompanied by Priscilla and Aquila. Before he sailed, he had his hair cut off at Cenchreae because of a vow he had taken.

Ok...so what? It seems like just factual information about where Paul is leaving, where he is going, and getting a new haircut. right?

Come to find out there is alot to be said about this.

precursor: I learned most of this from a Beth Moore Study and through looking up stuff in commentaries.

Ok, lets start by discussing where Paul just was. Cornith. And before that (according to chapter 17 of Acts) he was in Athens. Corinth was a place where many insults were hurled at him and he was persecuted. Athens was a place where everyone was "up on the new teachings." People were very open-minded...but not in a good way. They were open to things that were not of God.

Don't know if I explained Athens and Corinth very well or even in enough detail, but the point is that they were both places that were going to be difficult for Paul to preach in...and also probably a little tempting for Paul.

Lets move on to the part that talks about him going through a mid-life crisis and wanting a new hair style....kidding! Anyway, the verse states that he shaved his head marking the end of a vow. Now, scripture does not actually say what vow Paul had taken. So I don't want to say this is 100% for sure information. But it can be assumed that he had taken the Nazarite Vow. This vow (which you can read about in Numbers 6:1-27) was voluntarily made by those who desired to separate themselves unto the Lord for a determined season. And during this time there were 3 main restrictions. One of them being that "no razor may be used on their head."

It can be assumed that Paul knew full well before he went to Cornith and Athens that he would be entering places in which could potentially distract him from the God he loved and preached about. Therefore, this might be the reason for taking the vow in the first place.

NOW...those useless words mean something. How cool is that...that a man would be prepared ahead of time to be devoted to the Lord. That he did even something kind of extreme to remind himself of the vow he had taken. I mean a look in the mirror or a stroke through his long locks would help him remember who he is called to be and who he serves. Also, when others saw his long hair, it also was obvious who he served.

Like I said, it isn't certain if that is actually the vow that Paul had taken. But even if it isn't, there is something to be said about this Nazarite Vow. No...I'm not saying grow your hair out. I'm saying do obvious and practical things to devote yourselves to God. When you are boldly sharing Christ with those around you or serving those in need, it will be obvious that you are devoted to God. When you are doing practical things like setting an alarm on your cell phone to read the Bible, or posting scripture all over your home, or having an accountability partner, you are bound to remember the God that you are vowing to be devoted to.

Thank you Lord, that your Word can mold us and shape us today. I want to vow to be separated and devoted to You!

Saturday, January 15, 2011

struggling

I've been struggling lately with blogging! There have been quite a few times lately that I have started a new post just to erase and start over 3 or 4 times...then I just give up and quit. And when I DO blog and actually post it...I think, "well, that was boring!" But its frustrating, because there has been lots going on and lots I've been feeling. So I feel like I have lots to say! So why am I having such a hard time getting it out in words?

So I really have no idea where this post is about to go...or if it will make sense or possibly be misunderstood...or if it will even interest anyone! But here I go...

I've been having weird emotions about my kids lately. I'm so very back and forth. One minute I am almost in tears because they are growing so fast. Colin is almost 4! I find myself babying him alot because I feel like he is slipping from my fingertips and Im trying to squeeze in as much hugs, kisses, and holding as I can before he's too old for that. Same with Carley. The first year of her life is already halfway over! I think Im emotional about it because Im not for sure if there will be any more baby notelpats after this. There might be, but in case there is not I want to soak in every bit of this that I can.

However, there are also moments that I really desire to do something without my kids. *Gasp* I know there are some mom's who would really think less of mom's that desire time away from there kid's. But I promise I love my kids....a whole stinkin lot! But I also love my husband a whole stinkin lot and would love to do something with him that is not a youth event where tons of teenagers are around. So I struggle with desiring to be away and also feeling a little guilty for wanting to be away from them.

Then I also struggle with getting childcare for my kids. There are quite a few people that have offered to keep my kids...and I totally trust them and would not worry about my kids being with them. But Im bad about planning in advance. I wait until the day of to want to ask someone and then I end up not asking at all cause Im afraid they already have plans or if they do say yes Im afraid they are really not wanting too. I know that is the enemy's lies. When Colin was a baby we took him to this daycare for a few months that was not that great. I could tell the ladies hated there job and didnt want to be there. There is nothing worse than leaving your kid with someone who doesnt want to keep him. I guess I fear that happening again. And it wont....I mean these people have even offered already! I just need to plan in advance...and ask!

Then I get frustrated that my amount of leftover time and energy (and money even) does not match up with the things I want to do! I want to work out at a gym, sew and do crafts, read books, go see my families on the weekends, etc. and none of those things are happening for me! I also get a little sad because I'm afraid that I am hurting some of my friends/familys feelings for not giving them enough time.

The "working mom of 2" life is hard.

Don't get me wrong...I'm not complaining. I love my life SO much and have so much to be grateful for! I am thankful for my job during tough economic times. And I am grateful for my kids...and I'm not complaining about money...we have enough! I guess thats another reason why I have struggled with blogging. Every time I try to write, I feel like it sounds like I am complaining. So I apologize if that's what it sounds like.

So, thats what has been on my mind/heart lately. Loving my family, and loving my husband, and loving my friends and family. Even loving a little time to myself. But not feeling like there is enough of me to give to all of those things that I love. But I know most people feel that way, right?

Monday, January 10, 2011

Things I love...

1. I love how snow has the ability to force the world to stop its busy-ness and rest and enjoy the most important things in life. Loving this day off to spend with my kids. Just wish Jeff was home to enjoy it with us. But we had a great night at home last night as church got canceled. Enjoyed watching Jeff and Colin play in the snow.

2. I love craftiness. I have been looking at random blogs and have gotten SO many ideas of things I want to make. Most of which involve my sewing machine. Here is my to-do list of crafts. In no particular order.

  • re-purposed furniture into play kitchen for Carley for next Christmas (idea from Taylor)
  • sew an apron and matching pot holders to go with above kitchen.
  • more throw pillows for my couches and my bed.
  • curtains for my kitchen.
  • a play cape for Colin.
  • a valentines onesie and a first birthday onesie for Carley.
I just think creating something myself is WAY more fun/meaningful than buying it already made...and also more affordable.

3. I love that Carley has started reaching up her arms to me when she wants to be held. SO stinkin sweet. Love that girl.

4. I love that Colin loves to read his Childrens Bible at night. I love that he asks questions about God. My favorite one was "Mommy, does God have a car or a truck?"

5. I love different shades of green. Green makes me smile.

6. I love reading the Word. Good stuff. I do have a hard time, because the only time of my day that works for me to read is after the kids go to bed. Can't do it in the morning, cause they both wake up when I do. Even if I get up earlier, they hear me and wake up. Anyway, doing it that late at night is hard because I find myself fighting sleep. But I think its great that God can still speak to me even with heavy eyelids. I love that he is faithful to meet me and I am striving to meet him daily with his Word.

7. I love that my husband is so smart. And when I come across something that I don't understand in the Word...he clarifies. Love that man!

8. I love Spring and Summer weather. That is my nice way of saying that I am ready for this winter crap to be over. Hate being cold!

9. I love my parents and my in-laws. Wish we all lived closer.

10. Oooh! And I love that my mother-in-law found my bible and journal that I thought was gone forever! I cannot WAIT to get it back.