Just keep swimming...

The Notelpats life is running full force. We are very busy, but we are having fun and loving eachother. Here is a little glimpse into what has been going on...

Carley...she is a character. She is 22 months old. She will be 2 in June! I cannot believe how fast she is growing and changing. Some things she loves right now is "pushoos" (puzzles), reading books, taking her clothes off, running races with her brother, and she LOVES to sit in her fold up chair at Colin's tball games. It's actually Colin's chair...but I'm pretty sure she has claimed it and no one is allowed to sit in it but her. She is trying really hard to communicate lately, but doesn't speak clearly. So she gets frustrated when we don't understand. She has also become kind of picky and moody about food. Sometimes she eats supper...sometimes she doesn't. That bothers me, but I guess she'll eat when she is ready. One thing is for sure, you can't make her do anything. She'll do things when she is ready and if its her own idea. I have no idea where she got that from. :) I'm really enjoying my time with her lately. She's my little side kick. She goes to the grocery store with me, runs errands, follows me around the house when I clean, folds clothes with me. She's just calm and quiet and always with me. I like that. She does get loud and silly though when she plays with her brother and daddy. I am thankful for my little companion.

Colin...he is a different character! He will be 5 in July and will be starting Kindergarten! I'm a little sad that he has gotten that old, but excited that he will be going to school with me and that our child care expenses will be going down!! Some things he loves right now is tball games, playing basketball, listening to praise music/dancing, learning new verses, ping pong, Thomas the Train, "7 drink" (7-up), and going to Tumblebus at school. Pray for him, as he will be starting another medicine this week. His other medicine was working, but not enough. So we are adding another one. I'm apprehensive (like I was the first time) because of possible scary side effects. It's one thing for him to have side effects of upset tummy or dizziness. But when they talk about hallucinations,  personality/behavioral changes, etc. that bothers me. But he did well with this last medicine, so hopefully he won't have problems with the next.  The boy has always been this way, but more so lately...He LOVES his Daddy. He always wants to be with him and is devastated when he is gone. He's even been saying, "I want to ride/go with Daddy. But I'll still love you while I'm gone." I guess that's his way of telling me to not take it personally. Haha! I am thankful for my quirky, smart, sweet boy. I pray that he will do big things!

The Notelpat parental units are busy, busy, busy. It's constant communication between Jeff and I about scheduling, who is going to pick up what child and take this child here and this child there. But it always works out. I am thankful for a husband that pitches in and is actively involved. He gives baths, takes Colin to dr appointments, coaches tball, and even attempts to do Carley's hair....he tries atleast!

I've been trying to still squeeze in time for running. My awesome mom is lending me her treadmill for a while and that has made things easier for me to get running time in. I dread running, but once I start I really enjoy it and never regret doing it! I just wish I'd see results faster. But my main goal is not to lose weight but to tone. I'm doing this to have energy and to stretch out my bones. Chrons disease can cause stiff joints and I can tell a huge difference in that after I have run.

As far as our struggle that I've written about before about wondering what God has in store for our future, I've decided to chill out about it. I've spent so much time lately researching this option or that option. The Lord almost audibly said to me one day, "Don't seek an answer...seek me." I realized how different things would be if I spent as much time/energy digging and longing to find out more in his word rather than trying to figure out the next step in our life. I've done that this past week and it has been rewarding. The Lord will provide an opportunity for us in his time and I will continue to seek Him while we wait on Him.

What in the world...

I know I have blogged before about how I think everything is a great idea. I'm not apprehensive about much. I would move states or even countries, go back to school, change jobs, adopt, stay at home...I would do ANYTHING when it comes to life changes and following the Lord's calling. Most people say, "Oh that's a good thing! You must have an easy time obeying God." Ummm....not. It's because I've considered SO many options that I have a hard time obeying. I am easily distracted from what the Lord truly wants from my life because I am always daydreaming about "what if's." My mind is a racing jumbled mess of ideas that has left my heart unsettled and undirected. It's not that I don't want to obey, it's that I don't know what we're supposed to do. Jeff and I can see ourselves do a number of different things with our life. Our amazing pastor has said, "I can't imagine doing anything else but pastoring." ...I wish we could say that.

I know that God isn't as concerned as we are about the specifics of where we are living and our jobs and such. I know he just wants me to live a Christlike life and bring others to him wherever I am. I know that. But...I know that he also gives us talents, gifts, and desires to be used for his glory. And we are trying to figure out the best way for that to happen.

Here are some of my thoughts about what we desire as we struggle to find our place/direction. I thought that maybe if I narrowed down what we really desire rather than listing out places we want to go or things we want to do, then maybe things would be more clear.

1. I have to teach...in some form or fashion. It doesn't matter if it's with children in a public school, a sunday school class/small group at church, or even educating needy parents. It's what I do.

2. Jeff and I work together. I have a hard time separating myself from Jeff's ministry. I don't want to just be "the minister's wife." I want to be on the frontlines too. If it wasn't up to me to financially support our family, I would do ministry with Jeff all the time. But then again, I love my job too....See what I mean? It's confusing because I want to do it all!

3. Jeff is a visionary. He is creative and loves to dream and make things happen. But that desire can be fulfilled in 4 million ways. He could do a painting and temporarily fulfill that desire. So that's not real helpful in guiding us.

4. We are SO not good at this, but we do desire to be more relational with people. We want to make a difference in needy people's lives. Not helpful in guiding us either because there are people EVERYWHERE that need us.

*Sigh* So all of our desires seem so broad and can be used in so many different ways. Pray for us as we seek clarity and direction. No, we are not moving. I say that I would move anywhere, but I could also see myself living in Marshall for the rest of my life because I love the people here so much.

Lord, help me to put my well intentioned desires and plans aside and seek You. I want to obey you and please you with my whole life. So give me what I need to make you known today where I already am and give me guidance to make you known in the future.

"Many are the plans in a person's heart,

but it is the LORD's purpose that prevails." -Proverbs 19:21